AuntieBallistic

AuntieBallistic

AuntieBallistic
  • Updated:August 30, 2024 11:57 pm
  • Last visit:Yesterday at 12:42 pm
  • Member Since:June 18, 2002 7:22 pm
In between the bright lights and the far, unlit unknown, eh.
Male
April 14
My interests are myriad.
But the things that make me smile include:

My cute and totally adorable niece. She has the annoying tendency to melt my heart. Damned witchcraft!

Visiting Montreal. Beautiful city, gorgeous women and the Habs. What's not to like?

Fresh sushi. Especially unagi.

My Kobo e-reader. I fought against getting one, because I'm very much old school when it comes to books and reading. The smell of the paper, turning the pages, etc. But f*ck it....I finally caved and I'm glad I did. It's portable, cool and saves a ton of space. I'm loving it!
Now if only you could get p0rn on them......

Waking up to a snowstorm and realizing that it's Saturday - and there's nowhere you need to be.

A good, cold "tall-boy" can of European beer. Yeah....I'm a beer snob.
Suck on it, Budweiser and Coors.

Martin Scorsese's "The Last Waltz." It's not just a simple concert film, but an intimately-crafted homage by one of the great film directors of our age. Sadly four- fifths of The Band are now gone, but this film will always be around to remind us how great these five musicians truly were.

Well-made jambalaya.

The last 2 minutes of the Rush song "Jacob's Ladder".

Watching hockey and soccer live.

Playing tennis under the lights.

Playing soccer in the rain.

Portobello mushrooms.

Seeing and hearing a little brat screaming in any public place and feeling the gratitude and sense of relief when I realize that it's probably not my demon-spawn hellion.

The way stiletto heels and thigh-high stockings make an already shapely pair of legs even shapelier.

Primus - Featuring Les Claypool. Bass guitar as lead instrument. F*cking brilliant.

A Neil Peart drum solo. Rest in peace, Professor.

Long weekends. I'm talking, like, 2 months long.

A good book.

Norwegian p0rn.

The Shawshank Redemption.

Swimming in a pristine, cold lake in Ontario's cottage country.

The opening 2 minutes of "La Villa Strangiato"...Lifeson's classical guitar flourish followed by some astonishing Peart hi-hat and cymbal work, culminating in that crunchy electric guitar riff.....and the other 7.5 minutes of the song ain't too shabby, either.
I still have no idea how the #### they replicate that live, but they do.

"The Howling Man". Both the Charles Beaumont short story as well as the old Twilight Zone episode.

Arrested Development. A funnier show than Seinfeld. There, I said it and I'm not taking it back.
Aries (Mar 21-Apr 19)
I'm a hand model. Look at how awesome my cuticles are.
I said look at them!!!
Of all the people I've ever met in my life, I can honestly say that you're one of them.
I don't ride until at the very least the third date. I'm not THAT easy.
I don't even know what the hell that means.
 

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Personal

6'3"
180 lbs
brown
brown
Heh....good one!
But if you insist on a statement, how about this..."help!"
I'm a lapsed Catholic. Hoooooo baby, am I ever lapsed!
I'm as white as the National Hockey League.
Political Stance? Are you kidding me?? I prefer my politicians laying down and unresponsive. Preferably filled with embalming fluid.
I tend to use the standard tools; compass, folded map, nipple clamps and a double-headed dildo.
Oops. I thought that said "sexual orienteering".
This is suddenly awkward.....

Me likes the chicks. They have curves and bumpy things and smell nice.
What are you, a cop?

I'm happily not married. Never have been. Never will be.That's all I'm prepared to say without my attorneys present.
I suppose it's possible that there are several good looking little bastards running around out there somewhere.

But I'm not submitting to any dna tests without a court order.
I'm not wearing pants.
 

Favorites

Reading is as vital as sex.....but without the intricate pulley system, the matching his and hers french maid outfits, the cheese grater or the partially-scaled haddock, That said, I enjoy the works of Dan Simmons, Neil Gaiman, Joe Hill, Peter Straub, Michael Marshall, Robert Sawyer, Linwood Barclay, Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Richard Matheson, Ray Bradbury and others
Wayyyyy too many to list. And some of them don't even have pictures! Go read a book. It's good for you.
Anything sports or nekkid women-related. If they ever come out with a magazine featuring both, I'm gonna be all over it like a cheap suit.
Too much reality. I'll pass, thanks.
I've only appeared in a few. I tried to make sure my face was blacked out prior to distribution, but was unsuccessful. Lawsuits are still pending, so I can't really talk about them. As far as the movies I haven't actually appeared in, my favourites are; The Shawshank Redemption, The Usual Suspects, Jaws, The Taking Of Pelham One Two Three, Unforgiven, The General, Fargo, Breaker Morant, Miller's Crossing, The Godfather, Hoosiers, The Incredibles, Ravenous, The Professional, Snatch, The Wild Bunch, The Outlaw Josey Wales., Oh, and just about every movie that Marvel has made in the last 10 years.
I avoid reality tv like politicians avoid honesty and integrity. That said, I enjoy Breaking Bad, Dexter, The Walking Dead, Boardwalk Empire and Justified. And of course, there are my old dvd's of Arrested Development, Twilight Zone and Deadwood., But lately, it's all about Netflix. Too much good tv, not enough time.
No thanks, I don't know where they've been.
Rock, but I'm flexible. I like some old-school country, blues, jazz, even classical.
It begins and ends with Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson and Neil Peart...collectively known as Rush. Three musicians who sound like 5 or 6 when they play. I still have no idea how the hell they can do that, but they do. That's why they're the best rock band ever to come out of anywhere not called Great Britain, I'm a big fan of musicianship, and bands with a sense of humour. Songwriting is also vitally important. I don't tolerate bubble-gum pop, nor do I respect bands who copy the sound or style of other bands. This means you, Good Charlotte, Finger 11, Sum41 and Blink 182. The Clash and The Ramones did punk better than you ever could. , Aside from Rush, my tastes vary. I like everything from Tool, Primus and Faith No More, to Neil Young, Bob Dylan and Tom Petty, to The Band, Led Zeppelin, The Kinks and Warren Zevon, I could talk your ear off about music. If you catch me on the right day, I'll do just that. :-)
Name it, I've played it. Sometimes even clothed!
Montreal Canadiens, Dallas Cowboys, Toronto Raptors, Dinamo Zagreb
Anywhere but here.
Just about anything non-British.