• Updated:July 9, 2013 3:24 pm
  • Last visit:April 4, 2015 3:30 am
  • Member Since:August 8, 2010 10:58 pm
choosing to be here right now, usa
March 19
adrenaline, bass, bettie page, big beds, bisexuals, biting, black, black and white photography, blood, bondage, bracelets, butterflies, cage fighting, camping, candles, chocolate, christmas lights, cigarettes, clove cigarettes, coffee, concerts, cuddling, darkness, death, deftones, drawing, dreams, english accents, eyelashes, eyeliner, eyes, faeries, fire, fishnets, flirting, freaks, fruit snacks, ghosts, girls with short hair, glitter, guitar, guys with long hair, hair dye, hair products, handcuffs, hoodies, hot tubs, ice cream, icons, johnny depp, kissing, kittens, laughing, leather, leopard print, lollipops, macadamia nut cookies, make up, metal, mixed martial arts, my car, nail polish, night, ouija boards, piercings, pin-up girls, pink, poetry, popcorn, ####, psychology, rain,remembering, road trips, sarcasm, sex, short hair, shoulderblades, singing, slacking, sleeping, smiling, snow, southern comfort, spirit writing, spirits, stars, stealing road signs, steel toed boots, storm chasing, studded belts, stuff, susa, tattoos, the ocean, thrift stores, tool, ufc, whipped cream, wings, writing
Pisces (Feb 19-Mar 20)
Full Time Fucking Legend

"instead of getting paid, let's everyone give it our best shot. we'll do everything we love as hard as we can. work and trade and share and play and help each other out. cause work and trade and share and play beats the heck outta gettin' paid."
If, when I say I may fade like a sigh if I stay,
You minimize my movement anyway,
I must persuade you another way

Pushing and Shoving and
Pushing and Shoving and
Pushing me

There's no love in fear.

Staring down the hole again.
Hands are on my back again.
Survival is my only friend.
Terrified of what may come.

Remember I will always love you,
As I claw your fucking throat away.
It will end no other way.

"That's the good news.
That's the whole truth.
It's my best guess.
It's my rescue.
I've found proof irrefutable.
I'm immune to these beautiful lies.
I'm immune to these beautiful,
magical, wonderful,
excellent, succulent,
#### me, I wish you were true.

I'm immune to these beautiful lies"

"A little dust never stopped me none, he liked my shoes I kept them on."
we must blend into the choir, sing as static with the whole. we must memorize nine numbers and deny we have a soul. and into this endless race for property and privilege to be won.. we must run, we must run, we must run.

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more gutterpunk than ritzy. more glitz and glamour than others.

Hold it right there not one step closer to me cause i'm heavy, i'm heavy. my head just fills up. feelings in piles without one single file. its all a cloudy sky, crowded house. i'm heavy. now, i can't buy a cup of coffee without talking like a german author. she says "your change is thirteen cents" and i say "aren't you afraid of death?" and she said "where'd that come from?!" where did anything come from? mystery defeats purpose. we're just flesh machines, we just know this: the only thing real is pain, have a nice day. i'm heavy. if you wonder why i tell you that i'm heavy, well i'll tell you. it's an apology slash confession slash disclaimer slash expression slash my heaviness just makes me tell you everything about me and you say its good to know me, and you tell me its alright and you're right but you're light.. and i'm heavy.
i'm not gonna kid ya, kid. i'm a big fan of your religion, whatever it is.

i'm not gonna tell ya, kid.. how unconditional my love is. i'm not even gonna say what i just said although maybe i just did. and if i can't serve the highest good with these words, i'll lay some instrumental tracks down like some minstrel in the background. but i'm back for now. drowning in all of my experiences, experimenting and discounting interferences. looking for nothing and reporting all the treasures i find. using my words for celebration. building intimacy and kindness and talking about it to stay awake in the sea of the mindless. i dont mind swimming in the whitecaps, challenge is brimming with chance, like the planet is spinning. this dance is not lost in space, its flying by the seat of its pants. its guided by laws that no man ever passed. things just happen. people try to understand.. to fit the physics of god to the fix-its of man, to chain this mystery and language to entrance a pack of rats. we've got this knacked out pat now, we're masters. well maybe not.

"i'm gonna bust in on god when he's taking a piss, demand that he tell me the meaning of this, insist he admit that he owes me an explanation."
"we're standardized and practiced to the letter and to the knives we rented out auto pilots to operate our free-will machines. we kept our imaginations in mint conditions stored under piles of forms on the floor. i'm so bored with being normal i can't stand it anymore. we could be singing during sex, we can spend sunday in bed, we could take a sick day playing in the sand. shave a supermodels head, splatterpaint the bosses desk. we could sit and slack and stick it to the man."

"all the president's men killed 10,000 civilians without our permission. still millions stood still and just watched television. embraced all our sins with a flag on their chest praying for re election. i just dont understand how these god fearing people are so quick to shed blood but i dont think they're evil. 'cause theres no heartless leaders, no cogs, and no sheep. we're all brain, blood, and meat. we're all real human beings. we're not enemies and aren't we meant to love our enemies anyway? i believe that loves gonna change the world but we can't dink around though. love's gonna change your life but you can't dink around, you gotta find it in yourself."

"i was a long time coming
i'll be a long time gone
you've got your whole life to do something
and that's not very long
so why don't you give me a call
when you're willing to fight
for what you think is real
for what you think is right"
i believe there's as many ways to love people as there are people and there's probably more if you put your mind to it.
c'mon baby, why don't you fall right in my lap? grab a seat for this attraction. i wanna snatch you up in rapture, but i'm behavin'. i can't just grab you, i know that. thats why i'm asking you to fall right in my lap. why do you think i spread banana peels around my feet? why do you think i watched my knees when i asked you to have a seat? why do you think i'd study your eyes, what do you think that means? why do you think i tie dyed a bulls eye right on the front of these jeans?

"A lonely road, crossed another cold state line
Miles away from those I love purpose undefined
While I recall all the words you spoke to me
Can't help but wish that I was there
And where I'd love to be, oh yeah

Dear God the only thing I ask of you is
To hold her when I'm not around
When I'm much too far away
We all need that person who can be true to you
But I left her when I found her
And now I wish I'd stayed
'Cause I'm lonely and I'm tired
I'm missing you again oh no
Once again"

" So cast away all our cares in the world, like a worm on a hook on a cane pole line,
Let your hair down, kick your feet up let a country boy show you a real good time.

Girl let me love you, like its our last night, I wanna see the stars in your eyes, Then make a little magic there in the
moonlight, and top it off with a Texas sunrise."

"We might not oughta take a roll in the hay
Cause we'll burn the barn down a one of these days
We're a match made in Heaven and it ain't no joke
But I'd sure hate to see it go up in smoke
We gotta go thing goin' and if feels so right
She's a Firecracker
She's the light of my life"

two kids
all these f.y.i's and f.a.q's, ain't it clear i'm effin confused?

i have come curiously close to the end, down
Beneath my self-indulgent pitiful hole,
Defeated, I concede and
Move closer
I may find comfort here
I may find peace within the emptiness
How pitiful

It's calling me...

And in my darkest moment, fetal and weeping
The moon tells me a secret - my confidant
As full and bright as I am
This light is not my own and
A million light reflections pass over me

Its source is bright and endless
She resuscitates the hopeless
Without her, we are lifeless satellites drifting

And as I pull my head out I am without one doubt
Don't wanna be down here feeding my narcissism.
I must crucify the ego before it's far too late
I pray the light lifts me out
Before I pine away.

So crucify the ego, before it's far too late
To leave behind this place so negative and blind and cynical,
And you will come to find that we are all one mind
Capable of all that's imagined and all conceivable.
Just let the light touch you
And let the words spill through
And let them pass right through
Bringing out our hope and reason ...
before we pine away.

"I played connect the dots with your beauty marks
And I ended up with picture perfect sheet music
I read your musical notes with a composer's eyes
And heard our song for the first time
My spine is still tingling, mental images of your fine tune
is what I've been nodding my head to lately
Every now and then you can catch me humming
your nudity under my heavy breath
I heavily suggest you resurrect
your ancient neglected dust collector
If you distrust the distance in my seldom plucked heart strings
Sit stripped before your full length
Perform your reflection backwards
Maybe then you will understand the rhythm in my movement
Listen when the news is sent
Extend when the rules are bent
I'll be waiting to take your leave
Make me a victim of your two step
Make me an apprentice of your body parts
Teach me to dance to your beauty marks
I'm stepping on toes here and I don't care
It's hopeless, it's hopeless
It's hopelessness
It's hopelessness holding this openness to blow a kiss
So close your lips but don't get pissed
and throw a fist at this vocalist
I'm not emotionless, in fact I broke my wrist
when I wrote the list of all those I miss
This is my poker face, Mister Feel Nothing"


TOOL, Pink Floyd, Tori Amos, Tons more